Excuse me God, I have a question II
EXCUSE ME GOD I HAVE A QUESTION
I was begging for food one day
when someone saw me, bought a plate of food for me, and engaged me in a chat.
She told me, she’d been married for ten years, and was never pregnant in the first
seven. In the eight year, she took in and in nine
She said it was a witch in their
family that had caused it with voodoo and magical powers. Could there be
someone in my family too who is a witch and who is responsible for my
unfortunate life? Did they not say you are the all-powerful? How a Witch could have
killed a little baby and You didn’t stop him? If a family Witch is responsible
for my predicaments too, are You not going to do anything about him or her? The
woman is in her tenth year of marriage, but is yet to take in again after that
experience.
The other day I overheard some
people discussing the cruelty that life handed down to a lady. She had
struggled through primary school, had to fend for herself and self-sponsor
through secondary school. She made efforts to get into the university, she did
enter, but it was only possible after six tries. At first it was her SSCE she
struggled with for three years, and then came university matriculation
examination that took another four years. She managed to get through the system
with all the frustration that attended her tries, and eventually graduated, but
her problems did graduate with her too. It was seven years after graduation
before she got a job. What did she need to do? Whatever you think she should
have considered doing, she did. She’s still not married last I heard them
discuss. What a life? Why is life favourable to some and cruel to others? God,
I have a question. Locals are busy raping innocent girls and women in a certain
place and they even commit incest. They always get away with it, and look out
for their next target. It is fun for them, and perpetual stain for their
victims.
A guy was recently killed in cold
blood by a trigger-happy cop. And what did the law do? Find a reason why the
cop may have done it, exonerated him and retained him in the service. Now the
parents of that guy have to live only with the memories that they once had a
son like him. Is that fair? Is life fair? Why do bad people get away with
things they do, and it feels nobody will ever make them pay? Does nemesis
really exist? Lord, I have a question.
Why am I even in this world? If
this is the way my world is going to be, why won’t I just go back to times when
I was not? I mean times that darkness meant nothing because I didn’t even have
to open my eyes to see it. Times when I remained in a place I did not know and
did not have to come to this world that I know but has never been kind to me.
Times when whoever my father is supposed to be, did not know my mother, whoever
she is, and they both did not meet, and so did not produce me. Times when they
say children lived with you in heaven. Why am I not there now instead of here?
People say life is a product of choices, why is it that my own choice is not
resulting in a good life? Lord, are You even listening to me right now? Are you
feeling my pain? Is what I’m saying making any kind of meaning to You? Lord,
can You feel my pain? Can You hear my questions? Can You answer me?
As I continued to wander around for
lack of where to lay my head, I met a man. If anyone tried to describe
beautiful to me, maybe I saw beautiful in him. His appearance was everything
but comely. He reeked of extensive stench evidence of where he had always been.
That actually meant nothing to me because to be honest with you, I don’t know
who smelt worse, the man or me? God, what on earth could have happened to this
one too? Can there be someone who is truly free of some kind of pain? My
monologue continued and so did my conversation with this man. It’s the simplest
thing for me to be friends with people like these, like me.
He told me that he had been
incarcerated for thirty –five years. He was barely fifty-five, although he
looked seventy from the many blows that life had dealt him. He had been in
prison for thirty-five of his fifty-five miserable years. “For what?” I asked.
“For an offense I knew nothing about” he replied. Someone had murdered another
person in cold blood for whatever reason, and the police was on the murderer’s
trail. “I saw someone running towards me, and as I tried to make way for him,
he fell on me, and he stained me badly with the blood on his hands, I pushed
him as hard as I possibly could, but the damage had been done. I was in
quandary, and stood utterly bewildered when suddenly the police appeared, I
didn’t even know they were chasing the man.” He continued. “I pointed in the
direction the man ran, but no one would listen to me. I am sure they didn’t
even know whom they were chasing. Long story short, they took me in, and I had
no one to stand for me because… I was just a wandering man too” he said almost weeping.
That led to thirty-five years behind bars.
God where is your face? Why would
someone go through all of this just like that? Where is the face of justice?
Are some people born to suffer? Excuse me Lord, I have a question.
The man tapped me on the shoulder.
He must have noticed that I was lost in concatenation. “I used to feel the way
you are right now, but I am no longer angry. I still don’t have the life I
desire, but I am no longer angry. My life has changed.” God! Did I just hear
that?! How can you ever not be angry about that? Right there and then, I heard
something I’d longed for all my life. He did not say it out, but I heard
something like, “My child, I have an answer.” Whether that came from the person
standing before me or from the Person wishing to live in me, I honestly cannot
tell, but that soothes. My new friend taught me lessons in answers, and these I
will share with you next.
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